In My Defense (I Love Being With Her!)


I have spent my entire lifetime in association with men and women of my church. Through the many years I have served with them I have rarely had negative interaction with them.   However, many years ago while serving as a young and inexperienced church leader I had a singular negative encounter with another leader who I had never met.  It was probably the ugliest experience I had ever had as a church member. I spent an hour on the phone at my office in what ended up being a heated exchange of words. During the course of that exchange, words were said by me and by him that were regrettable. The words of criticism of a personal nature by him shook me up. When I got off the phone, I laid my head down on my desk and cried. I was bothered all day by the outcome of our conversation. Upon arriving home from the office, my wife met me at the door and could tell that something was bothering me. She followed me upstairs to the bedroom.  I closed the door and sat on the bed. I could barely get the story out when tears started to flow down my cheeks. I babbled on about the phone call that I had received.  As I recited the story, I told her how our conversation became very personal. In other words, the criticism was directly of me.

As I sat on the bed telling my sad tale, she jumped up, grabbed the phone beside the bed and said, “Who is this man to say such things to you. He doesn’t even know you. He has no ideal what kind of man you are. I’m going to call him right now and tell him what I think!”. There she was, phone off the hook, looking to dial with fire in her eyes. It was so funny that I started to laugh. I told her to put the phone down, which she did. I will never forget how much love I felt, seeing her fiercely standing there in my defense!  It was so opposite of her personality to act that way.  I’m  sure she really wouldn’t have made that call.  But it was nice to know she thought so much of me that she would defend me so.

Every man should be blessed with a wife like mine.  Over the past forty plus years we have had our differences. Who hasn’t! She is passionate about things. So am I. But often as we are driving along she will look at me and tell me how great I am. And even though I know it’s not true, it’s nice to hear it. She’s definitely “My Best Friend.”There is no one I would rather spend time with than her.

As we have gotten older, I seem to spend more of my time trailing behind her in the malls. But, over the years I have also come to treasure the look on her face when she finds something she likes. Or, when something she tries on fits and she can tell that I like it. Or when she holds up some shoes and asks me what I think.  I didn’t used to like to do things like that when I was younger. In reality, I really don’t love it now, but I’ve learned to pretend.  Maybe that’s not right. But in my defense, I may not really love going shopping with her, but  what I do love, is being with her!

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